Rethinking the Single Life

Dear Readers, 

Is it me or have you noticed that when people are engaged in a relationship, situationship, partnership, marriage, or domestic partnership, that they tend to have a negative view towards individuals who prefer not to be a part of a couple. In other words, they are single, living alone, and not interested in dating. Why, because they have discovered the pleasure of being single. 

People who enjoy the single life style in some people’s opinions are rebelling against the principle that society, family, religion and cultural beliefs set forth that it’s not normal to want to be alone. My son warns me about ” staying alone too long on my island.” Well, let the truth be told, I’ ve had one horrible marriage that resulted in domestic violence. I’ve experienced many relationships that were only bad situationships, and arriving at the age of 57, I’m learning the meaning of a true partnership. 

I used to fear being alone. I was one of those people who had to be around someone and I always had dates lined up. The problem was I did know how to enjoy my own company. I thought the idea of ” being with oneself” or ” enjoy spending time with self” was nonsense. My childhood home was a revolving door of people coming and going. I went from my parents house to my husband’s house. When I got my divorce this stage of my life began the road to relationship after relationships, date night, parties, men sleeping over and on and on. 

A few years ago, I let go of the ideal of finding Mr. Right and challenged myself to find out who I am, and my true passion and purpose. It’s been seven years since I began this journey of self discovery, it hasn’t been easy, but I’ ve liked the knowledge I gained by spending time with ME. I no longer fear being alone. I often have movie night with popcorn and wine. I love watching cooking shows and find myself in the kitchen cooking delicious meals for myself. I like the space and peace of living alone. And currently, I have no desire to go back out into the messy world of dating. 

For the naysayers, here are a few points to think about that single people enjoy. 

1. Single people can sleep late without someone interrupting their rest ( my days off I spend the day in bed).

2. Single people can cook when and what they want or order take out.

3. Living a single lifestyle means your time is your own, and you don’t have to check in with a partner, who is tracking your movements.πŸ“±

4. Freedom, single people can leave home when they desire and return when they want.πŸ‘

5. Living alone means that a person can arrange their living environment in the manner they like. 

6. Single people can do what they like in their own living space like clean or not to clean.

7. One of the joys of being single, you don’t have to share the bed ( I discovered the joys of sleeping alone).

8. Living alone means that there is no fighting unless you want to fight with yourself πŸ˜ƒ

9. Single people can spend their money without a partners nagging objections about spendingπŸ’°

10. Overall, being single, not dating, spending time with myself, enjoying the freedom of not being responsible for or to another person, a peace of mind, coming home to a clean quiet house has done wonders for my mental and emotional well being. This life isn’t for everyone, but it’s works for me ❀️.

Thank you for reading dragthepen

What say you?

My first book available on amazon

15 thoughts on “Rethinking the Single Life

  1. Single or in a relationship, people should always do what is right for them. The one variant is that if you are in a relationship, you should think of the other person, as well or even before yourself. I do not find this a chore, often. As a matter of fact, it comes quite easily after more than 43 years together. No person should presuppose their way of living is the right way or the only way. It is just the way they choose. PS. With my crappy sleeping habits, I am likely the one waking her up. 😊

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi. Thank you for your point of view. Congrats on 43 years. You brought up one very important point about being in a relationship thinking about the other person before yourself. I am afraid that being alone for so long I have become very selfish 😊

      Liked by 1 person

      • Yes, absolutely what I am referring to is the quality of life. I am not implying that people in relationships don’t have a good quality of life, but it’s been my experience that my seven years of being single has given me the time, peace and space to enjoy my life on a different level. Thank you for sharing ❀️

        Liked by 1 person

  2. It was 12 years after my husband died that I finally went out on a date. I focused on my children and my career. After the kids left home, I started online dating at age 64 and met Robert. We have lived together for 7 years and plan to marry after covid 19 is over. There are trade-offs, but I prefer being with someone. We enjoy being together, but both need our space.

    My sister has had very bad experiences with relationships, and, like you, enjoys being single. Whatever choice we make, it should be respected. All the best, JR! ❀

    Liked by 1 person

    • Wow. This is wonderful. I am happy that you’ve shared your experience. Yes, I do agree that life is better with a partner. I wish you blessing on your up coming marriage ❀️


  3. Well said! I think that learning how to be good company to yourself can ultimately help in learning how to be good company to a partner too. People tend to think that being alone means we just let ourselves go, but truly caring for ourselves is not sitting around eating junk food. It is a process of developing our awareness of and managing our emotional, physical, and spiritual needs.

    Liked by 1 person

    • First, thank you for stopping by dragthepen ❀️. Second, I am delighted by your comment and I agree with you πŸ’― percent. I wish I had the knowledge in my younger years maybe I would have made better choices. But you know what they say, better late than never.πŸ˜ƒ

      Liked by 1 person

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