Are you like the person you want to date?

Dear Readers,

In this complicated world of dating men and women are rolling out a list of requirements for their potential partner. So here we are gone are the days when boys meets girl, boy likes girl, they are joined together in Holy matrimony and live happily ever after.

Nowadays people are requiring proof employment,  credit checks, salary requirement, ownership of property, conducting background checks, prenuptial agreements, his and hers bank accounts,the use of credit cards, expensive gifts, in addition to some women asking for a monthly allowance.

Let’s cut to the chase for the men and women who play the dating game here is a bit of advice make sure your creating the exact lifestyle that your requesting from a future partner. In other words, be the person that you want to date or marry. Let me clarify ………

If your requiring a person to earn six figures,  have an education, be stable in their profession, good health, honesty,  compassion, emotionally stable, live by good values, than the big question, is your life a reflection of these requirements? The most common question people ask is “what are you bringing to the table?” There are individuals who will hardball a potential partner to match the standards that they have created for their life. Why, because they desire to continue in the standards they have created. And in this modern time of self sufficient women, men are requirementing women to contribute more to the relationship than good looks and  being a freak in bed, and ladies newsflash men are turned off by your personal laundry list of needs to be maintained, thus the term ” high maintenance.”

And vice versa women are no longer falling for the smooth lips of sweet talking men,  persuading them to part with their money, drive their cars, and free load by moving in their space. Men and women need to grow up and act like the mature adults they claim to be. People are foolish if they expect to call all the shots and engage relationship, where they are reaping all the benefits from a personal list of requirements, using the other  as a doormat, ATM machine, and treating their homes like a pit stop dropping by to have their needs meet before quickly moving on.

People who expect to engage in relationships for personal agenda void of an emotional or spiritual connection that isn’t a relationship its a business proposition. And the sad conclusion is when the benefits run out so do these benefit seeking indivduals, moving on to the next benefical relationship. These individuals should stick with the circle of  trolls who are incapable of a legitimate  human connection.

For the mature adults who are emotionally stable, financially responsible, have career longevity, feet are planted firmly on the ground, live in reality, and are ready for a relationship, may I suggest these  requirements? Honesty, respect, compassion,  love, keep an open line of communication and  be supportive of your partners visions. Above all work together building a foundation of friendships, trust, and grow together. Don’t forget to laugh and be playful. Be the person who you would want to date or marry. If your asking your partner for 100 percent than be willing to do the same.

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Mr. & Mrs. GREENBACKS

Can a relationship survive Infidelity?

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Dear Readers, Today’s topic: infidelity, cheating, being unfaith, side piece 

I like to establish ground rules before diving into this subject. When referring to people in relationships, I am not talking about people who are chronic cheaters. I am referring to people who pledge in their hearts to be in an exclusive relationship or marriage vowing to forsake all others. 

People who are in a committed relationships and outside of the relationship to engage in a sexual relationship with another person, you are a cheater because having a side piece is not a part of the deal. To my readers, is it worth mending a relationship when a partner cheats? And here is the big kicker, the double standard, women who forgive men who cheat, but on the other hand, men will not stay in a relationship and forgive a woman who cheats on him. Why is this? Could it be that his manhood is challenged? 

Cheaters give all kinds of reasons for being unfaithful. However, is there any true justification for being involved in a sexual relationship when engaged in an exclusive relationship or marriage? The sad part is the innocent people who are caught up in their cheating partners sexual entanglement, the cheater doesn’t realize or care at the moments that they are getting their jollies off, that when the cat is out of the bag, so to speak, that there will be people who feel betrayed, scarred, and emotional broken. 

The Excuses 

1. A man who considers himself a committed bachelor, he uses this non relationship status as an excuse to have sexual relations with multiple women.

2. If the fire of romance dies in a relationship or one partner becomes physically unattractive. The cheater uses this to make the innocent partner feel guilty. 

3. Lack of sexual satisfaction or boredom.

4. The thrill of sneaking around and tasting the forbidden fruit.

5. Couples who marry at an early age and have not had sexual experience with other people. 

6. Men blame their spouse for not pleasing them or that she has lost interest in being intimate. And vice versa for the women who cheat on their male partners. In other words, the cheater is saying that their partner is not enough. 

I can imagine the pain, mental anguish, and emotional frustration the innocent partner struggles through. The first time it happened to me I walked in on my cheating partner. The second time it was a rumor that got back to me. When I confronted my partner, he confessed. I trusted men who cheat, and justify it by using lame lines like, “I love my spouse ” or ” it was just sex it did not mean anything” and ” it was a mistake.” So, am I to understand that each time the cheating partners planned to meet with their outside piece it was a mistake?

I am going to leave this right here….

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