Public display of affection (PDA) Romantic Gestures or Not?
We have witnessed couples French kissing in public, or the couple kissing every two seconds, and groping each other. They don’t appear to be uncomfortable with public displays of affection leaving the people around them squirming, cringing and rolling their eyes in disapproval thinking “Get a Room.” The question is how much public display of affection is over bearing, and are there places that are off-limits like, public transportation, the beach, parks, and the middle of the street. Is public display of affection an expression of love or just bad etiquette and inappropriate? In some cultures, PDA is taboo and regarded as disrespectful. Why do people feel the need to indulge in public displays of affection?
Does it matter why or how people are displaced from their home, apartment, hut shack or igloo? The space people personalize with a favorite chair, coffee or tea-cup; and an old creaky bed that sleeps comfortable. The walls painted with colors that reflect the celebration of life and love. Pictures hung in the right places capturing silent stories, moments of laughter and sorrow. HOME a scared abode, where children are raised, grandchildren visit, where parents and grandparents are nurtured during their golden years.
For the first time in my life I am lodging in someone else’s space; having been dislocated from my corner of paradise. I sit in my room, where there are no pictures of familiar faces, sleeping in a strange bed, sitting on a wooden chair, one single lamp, void of a writing or vanity table. My belongings are stored in suitcases and an overnight bag. Such strange and uncomfortable feelings because I don’t know how to be in someone else’s’ space. They say that I should “make myself at home.” How Can I make someone else’s home feel like mine? Is this possible?
I am deeply grateful to the family for their kindness during this time of hardship. But I worry about proper etiquette. I lay awake at night thinking did I clean after myself? Or would it be insulting to my host family if I slept in on my days off? Can I have a cup of tea and a snack in my room before bedtime? I don’t know how long finding my own space will take. I am told “There is no rush take your time.” How much time are they referring too? This is all so unsettling?
There are many misconceptions that are vocalized about black men, some of these myths come directly from black people themselves. We are told that black men don’t take care of their children, are drug dealers, and thugs. They lack ambition, cheap, financially bankrupt, don’t love sistahs, dishonest, thieves, murders, uneducated, loser, and project rats. They are on the down low, cheaters, and are still slaves to the white man. What say you about these educated, well read, self-motived, demonstrating proper etiquette young black men? I happened upon them looking through the carts of free books at BMCC. No one bribed them or promised them a reward for expanding their knowledge by reading. Take a good look at these black men. They are the next generation of Doctors, Layers, Scientist, Congressmen, Mayor, Governor, Educators, and Business men. Before lumping all black men in a barrel take a good look around, you might be amazed at what you see. I was.
Thank you, pardon me, please, would you mind if I… I am sorry…I did not mean to…..
There was a time when people used their inside voices and manners in place like: libraries, museums, churches, theaters, restaurants and even on public transportation. Initially, being quiet and respectful was too expected, appreciated and the norm. The pleasure of closing out the business and noise of the outside world was a welcomed relief. The act of disturbing someone’s peace was considered a breach of social protocol.
Nowadays noise and being rude is the new commonplace. It seems that the louder and the ruder the better. People are learning to adjust to an increase in noise and bad mannerisms by plugging up and tuning out with more noise; or speaking louder than the conversation next to them. Moreover, making matters worse, we are living in a society of advanced technology that contributes to people exhibiting bad behavior. Furthermore, proper etiquette is no longer being instill in homes, schools and in the work environment. The attitude is that it’s an imposition to ask others to use proper decorum because we have become accustomed to conducting ourselves in an improper manner, and being corrected is considered as an insult.
Do you agree or disagree that we are living in a society that supports the lost art of manners?