Dear Readers,
As many times as it has been said and will be said, Happy New Year! Todays, conversation is not about keeping New Year’s resolutions or encouraging you to make a bucket list. I Think people are more focused on making sense of how to endure this on going pandemic.
Today’s topic is inspired by a sister friend who sent me an article from the New York Post, “What is Handballing”? The newest dating trend for singles, by Josie Griffiths. The term handballing is a dating method used when an individual meets a prospective partner, he or she is very clear, and in some cases aggressively forceful about expectations on how they are willing to pursue a relationship. Ladies I like to speak to concerning this subject because nowadays, women are changing their approach about relationships. The trend that I see is that women are taking steps to establish a foundation of friendship, leading to a relationship and then marriage. Today’s generation of women are clear about not want to be trapped in the cruel cycle of the dating game, messy situationships or entanglements. The article is clear that handballing is the new method that single people are using to avoid wasting time because these individuals are dating with a purpose.
The million-dollar question and concern for women is when is too soon after meeting a person of interest should they handball? After all isn’t the goal of dating with a purpose is to get him interest in you? The answer to that question is no because this is the old way of thinking and pursuing relationships. Handballing isn’t about getting the person to be interested in you,
“handballing” is about digging deep and investigating whether the person is thinking on the same level of emotional maturity, setting standards and boundaries, monogamy, children, no children, marriage, and knowing the importance of compromising fairly. In other words, ladies be up front about the qualities that will be the foundations for developing a lasting relationship. If after having engaged in a hardball question and answer session with your date and he doesn’t call again, oh well, you know what he was after.
I enjoyed the article it is refreshing to know that there is a population of single people who won’t settle and are willing to wait for a suitable partner. To my female readers don’t be afraid to speak up, stop being “ Handballed” by individuals who discourage you by using the myth of the biological clock, or encourage you to take who you can get rather than who is more suitable to your desires. And it is ok to disconnect from dating men who will only want you to “go with the flow and see where things go.” Don’t cheapen yourself by keeping deadbeat men around who will only sweet talk you into being passive and trapped in relationships that don’t fulfill your needs. Its better to find out where you stand by using “handballing” method than to lower your standards and end up with less than you deserve.
Thank you for reading.
dragthepen 