Don’t Say Forever……

Dear Readers,  A sneak peek into a short story in progress. Happy Reading.

Don’t Say Forever……

I did not hear the urgency in her voice I was excited about our weekly rant session. The first clue that something was wrong we didn’t meet at our usual diner for loaded nachos and Long Island Ice tea, with an extra shot. Instead, we met at a fancy tea-house in China Town. When I sat down Katherine looked at me with a death stare and said,

“I hope you have some spare time, this could take a while.” When I looked into Katherine’s usually big brown, beautiful, shiny, eyes, they were dull and blood-shot.

The atmosphere of the teahouse is solemn and dim. This disturbed me because I was in the mood for the cheerful, bright lights and noise of the diner. Kathrine ordered a pot of Earl Grey tea and a glass of sake. My thoughts were racing I’m confused, we talked two days ago and she was her normal lively self. After the table was set and I made tea Katherine took a long drink from her glass of sake, and initiated the conversation…

“This was supposed to be the greatest adventure of my life. I have waited a decade for my King and soul mate. When Samuel got down on one knee, and placed this ring on my finger and ask me to be his life partner, at that moment I felt as though I’d awaken from a long and terrible nightmare.”

I’ve known Katherine for fifteen years she’s been my rock and road dog. I’ve seen this fearless women battle life struggles like a true warrior Queen. She has slayed some ugly demons and dethroned men, and like a hunger and anger lioness, she pursued her ambition of becoming a tenure English Professor and accomplished that goal. The person sitting in front of me, I don’t know her.  Katherine took another drink from her glass of sake and continued.

“It’s my fault, I moved too fast. I should have taken your advice and kept my apartment; my haven; where no one dictated to me. He kept pushing me to move in. I wanted to wait until we were husband and wife.”

Katherine ordered another glass of sake. I reached out across the table grabbing her hand; she squeezed mine with a death grip. Our eyes locked. In hers, I saw grief, regret and something I’ve never seen before defeat.

Kathrine continued, “This relationship is a mistake. Samuel is smothering me and wants to take away my life. He want me to become the relationship.”

I had to say something; I wanted her to stop and breathe. “I’m confused. I thought you said he’s being supportive.”

“Yes, he was while we were under two separate roofs. Samuel says that my goals are for a single person, and since I’m no longer single, I need to think about what’s good for the relationship.”

“What?”

“I rejected an offer to teach for six weeks in Korea because he feels that we haven’t established a solid foundation. He follows me everywhere, he is clingy, needy and he whines. There’s no peace in the house because he talks nonstop, and he interrogates me about everything. The only peace I have is when he isn’t home, when I’m at work and when he doesn’t follow me to church.”

Guilt swept over me. I encouraged Katherine to open her heart and give Samuel a chance.    I watched Katherine dry her teary eyes.

“Come stay with me.”

“Oh no, I will remain right where I am for the next two years.”

“What? Why? I don’t understand.”

“I’ve pondered this situation for weeks; I don’t have to think about forever with Samuel.”

“I don’t get it; you’re going to continue to live with a man you say is not the one.”

“Yes, I am in the best possible position to achieve my goals with financial ease. What is our biggest struggle as single women?”

“Rent.”

“Yes, I don’t pay rent, Samuel does. I pay the smaller expenses. I will continue to play the dutiful fiancé while completing my next two novels, my M.F.A. in addition to going back to the  New York City DownTown Chours to sing at Carnegie Hall, and Samuel will be standing beside me.  In two years, I can retire from teaching. To solidify the deal I will marry him and plan our honeymoon in Aruba.”

“Now I’m truly lost, you’re going to marry him.”

“Yes. Remember the little villa I have in the hills of St. Vincent that no one knows about except you.”

“Yes.”

“While we’re on our blissful honeymoon I will escape and go there. When he reports me missing he’ll become the main suspect.”

“Are you seriously going to do this?”

“Yes. I will be very happy on my little island; while he sits in jail.”

“What make you think Samuel will go to jail?”

“I’ll plant evidence pointing to his guilt.”

“What do you need me to do?”

“Oh, no I’m not going to get you involved in this the less you know the better.”

“I won’t let you do this alone. Remember we promised to be friend until the end, no matter what.”

“This is going to be a long two years, but I can’t leave unless I have the funds to support myself. I have a friend who works for a bank in St. Vincent she, will help me transfer my retirement checks there without anyone being able to trace them.”

My best friend will be gone in two years. What am I going to do?”

We continued to meet for our weekly rant sessions. I don’t know how Katherine did it; living each say in such misery.  Katherine kept an exhausting schedule, when she needed rest, she stayed at my place; by the end of the first year, she published one novel, half way through the second manuscript, and had completed her M.F.A.

The start of the second year Katherine said it was time to begin to focus the plan. She began to close all of her accounts transferring the money to a bank overseas. She cancelled her credits cards and for the rest of her life she will have to use cash she did not want to create a paper trail. Katherine through of everything she knows a someone who knows a guy who can create fake documents for her to assume a new identity. I begin to panic this was becoming real. I’ve heard of people doing stuff like this, I’ve seen movies of people planning how they would vanish, but this is close to home……stay tune for more of  Don’t Say Forever……

 

In the meantime, Read A Different Flavor of Love, by J. R, Floyd, Available On Amazon. https://www.amazon.com/Different-Flavor-Love-J-Floyd

Also, tune into my new YouTube Channel, Conversations from my Couch, and Hosted by me. Here is a sneak peek……. https://youtu.be/qYj5sSJepqE

 

Til Death Do Us Part

Dear readers,

I recently attended a wedding for my longtime friend Cindy, and best road dog ever. After missing her for two months due to the honeymoon and the newlyweds moving into their new condo; we finally had a chance to meet at our favorite coffee shop to exchange holiday gifts, and to share our usual sinfully delicious cinnamon bun and hot chocolate.

I couldn’t wait to hear about the happy life of wedded bliss. She showed me pictures of the wedding and honeymoon, and we talked about the unpacking of her fabulous new residence. During the conversation I sensed that she wasn’t enjoying the ecstasy of marriage. I stop the conversation and looked her straight in her eyes and said” this is me your bestie, road dog, and do or die sistah for life, what are you not telling me?” I wasn’t prepared for her answer, it blew my mind.

She said, “I waited for my prince to come, since the disaster of my first marriage, I’ve waited twenty five years, prepared myself, by acquired a good education, and securing the career of my dreams, along the way I’ve had my share of being disappointed, but I held into hope that my prince would come. I’m 55 and Bennie is 8 years my senior. He’s been a hardworking man and will soon retire with a good income, and no plans as to what he will do with himself. My new husband enjoys traveling, something that I can look forward too. He is humorous, generous, attentive, respectful of my needs and supportive of my career goals.”

Me: “Ok. So, what’s the problem?”

Cindy: “Yes, it all sounds good, but on the second day of the honeymoon, I realized that I settled.

Me: “I’m confused you just rumbled off a list a of positive qualities about Bennie.”

Cindy: “It became clear to me that on our honeymoon he doesn’t have the energy to keep pace with me socially and physically. He is a slow thinker, not very creative, has no hobbies, and he isn’t in the best of health. I knew about his bad knees and the hip, but I found out about the gout and sciatica. Bennie will be able to provide a lovely home for me, but I fear that as he gets older out quality of life will decline and I will become his caretaker.”

Me: “Why didn’t you continue to wait for someone in your age range?”

Cindy: “I settled because I didn’t want to wait too long; and the list of the qualities that I wanted in my partner was getting shorter and shorter. I settled because I lost hope and I didn’t want to risk being along for the reminder of my days. I settled because I felt beaten down by life, I gave up, surrendered my list, shallowed my pride and throw in the towel so to speak.”

Me: “Do you love him?”

Cindy: “I don’t think about that what I have with Bennie is companionship, a great travel partner, a man who is concern for my needs, he knows his duties as a husband and is eager to have me as his wife.”

Me: “Sounds one sided.”

Cindy: “No, it’s not, I will do all that I can to see that Bennie is happy and taken care of. His home will be well-kept, he will eat a well-balanced and healthy diet. We will go to the gym together because he like to try to keep fit. I have every intention of honoring my marriage vows. Anyway, let’s change the subject. I want to tell you about the dinner party me and Bennie will host.”

And just like that Cindy was able to forget all that she said to me. While she talked about the party. My mind went back to all that she had said, and I wondered, how many others have settled, but don’t have the guts to admit it.

What say you