Love & Marriage

Dear readers,

Remember the TV series Married with Children , 1987-1997, and that theme song, ” Love and Marriage, love and Marriage they go together like a horse and carriage.” Speaking of the subject love and Marriage, Tina Turner had a hit song, What’s love got to do with it? For the majority of people who are married they will say they said ” I do” because of love. There is a movies produced by Tyler Perry that ask the question, Why Did I Get Married?

I read  an article by Maggie Gallagher: What’s Marriage Got to Do With Love?

She writes,

Why do lovers marry? For centuries the answer might have been self-evident, but in today’s world where cohabitation is more bourgeois then bohemian, it’s an open question. I posed it not long ago to a group of young, college-educated women. Krista, a 23 year old writer, tried to explain why its so important to her that she and her live -in boyfriend get married. ” I just love the words ” husband and ‘wife”, she says, almost ruefully. ” I know the words are archaic, but I just love the whole idea.”

Krista, like the other young women in the room, lives with the omnipresent reality of divorce. they know a marriage license is no guarantee of permanence. Sex and affection they already have from their boyfriends. Yet, women like Krista long, almost irrationally, for the nuptial bond. the words ” I love you have been drained, through overuse, of all special meanings. and the act of love no longer signifies union. All that is left is this fail, eroding word, ” marriage,” packed with centuries of loving, living growing old together, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.

American are marrying people-like Krista, nine out of 10 adult women tie the knot at least once. And yet Americans also have the highest divorce rate in the western world. How do we reconcile the cultural contradiction.

What say you?

love-and-marriage

Who are you dating?

Dear Readers,

Dating has become a dangerous game. Back in the day dating had a purpose simply put to find a life partner. Today, people date with hidden agendas. It’s disturbing to know that there is individual who purposely scheme and prey on people to engage in a fake relationship.

Some people date or participate in a relationship based on another person’s salary, the car they drive, and how much material items this person is willing to give them. This type of person is a freeloader, or an opportunist because they see their victims as an opportunity and a convenience. And when the next person comes along who can offer them more they conveniently leave the person they are dating (or engaged in a false relationship) without regards to the emotional damage they leave behind.

There is the serial dater. Meaning, the person who dates or engage in a relationship with two or multiple people at the same. These in between daters don’t have a sense of feeling that they are doing any harm. They justified this disrespectful behavior by claiming to be in love with the people they are dating; and they swear on a stack of bibles that they find it difficult to make the choice to be with one person. LIES!

Then there is the Representative, if you’re dating this type of person these are people who show up and portray themselves as the ideal mate or the person who is just right for you. They present themselves as the quintessential person to have a romantic relationship with. They exhibit qualities that can woo and fool the best of us. The problem with these Representatives is that their intentions are wrong. They are not who they say they are. Their primary goal is to scheme, deceive, breakdown, and destroy their victims; while engaging in a false relationship. When these Representatives have accomplished his or her mission, they move on quickly, leaving in their path emotional and financial bankrupt people; who have no idea until it’s too late that they have been bamboozled by a Representative.

Have you found yourself dating a Visitor, meaning a person who shows up like a guest. The Visitor will claim to be committed to the relationship, but not as a full-time partner. The Visitor will make an appearance only when the time is convenient for them. Dating a Visitor is like being at a pit stop; they will come through to have their needs attend to, and before you can blink they are gone. The Visitor can appear and disappear in and out of a relationship like a magician. Being in a relationship or dating situation with a Visitor is emotionally and mentally draining so, the next time you observe yourself dating a Visitor, put out a No Vacancy sign.

At the first encounter there is no meter to measure whether the person we seek to be in a relationship is who they say they are, and have good intention. I recommend that when dating take your time, don’t rush and when something doesn’t feel right go with that feeling. Don’t wait around for another person to complete who you are. You are enough as you are. Love yourself like you want the others person to love you. When you don’t resolve baggage from past relationships and behave in a desperate manner that’s when you fall victim to these people who are Freeloaders, Representatives, and Visitors. Pay attention to what they say or don’t say. There are warning signs, but people become so involved in the emotional rollercoaster while dating that they loses sight of the warning signs. For the people who have lost faith in finding love, be the love that you want to receive.

What say You? Check out my You Tube channel: Conversations with J. R. Floyd for more realtionship topics. 2DgfpAQ6

The Condition of Love

Dear Readers,

I challenge you to think about LOVE. How do you define LOVE? How do you express LOVE? Today’s’ modern version of LOVE, it’s seems that people are placing conditions and restriction on LOVE. I appreciate, understand and respect the fact that people are choosy  about who they fall in LOVE with, but what about this  idea of conditional LOVE versus unconditional LOVE.

LOVE: should be pure flowing from an open heart with good intentions

LOVE:  should uplift to add to and not take away from

LOVE: LOVE: should allow you to shine

LOVE: should not be used as a bargaining weapon LOVE should not feel bad

How do you LOVE?

Before, During and After you say ” I do”

Dear Readers, Conversations with J. R. Floyd is dedicated to discussing  relationships issues, men and women empowerment & exploring the broken foundation of the family structure. Support me by subscribing to my You Tube channel where you can watch more videos . Thank you for watching. Don’t forget to leave a comment.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Who are you dating?

Dear Readers,

Dating has become a dangerous game. Back in the day dating had a purpose simply put to find a life partner. Today, people date with hidden agendas. It’s disturbing to know that there is individual who purposely scheme and prey on people to engage in a fake relationship.

Some people date or participate in a relationship based on another person’s salary, the car they drive, and how much material items this person is willing to give them. This type of person is a freeloader, or an opportunist because they see their victims as an opportunity and a convenience. And when the next person comes along who can offer them more they conveniently leave the person they are dating (or engaged in a false relationship) without regards to the emotional damage they leave behind.

There is the serial dater. Meaning, the person who dates or engage in a relationship with two or multiple people at the same. These in between daters don’t have a sense of feeling that they are doing any harm. They justified this disrespectful behavior by claiming to be in love with the people they are dating; and they swear on a stack of bibles that they find it difficult to make the choice to be with one person. LIES!

Then there is the Representative, if you’re dating this type of person these are people who show up and portray themselves as the ideal mate or the person who is just right for you. They present themselves as the quintessential person to have a romantic relationship with. They exhibit qualities that can woo and fool the best of us. The problem with these Representatives is that their intentions are wrong. They are not who they say they are. Their primary goal is to scheme, deceive, breakdown, and destroy their victims; while engaging in a false relationship. When these Representatives have accomplished his or her mission, they move on quickly, leaving in their path emotional and financial bankrupt people; who have no idea until it’s too late that they have been bamboozled by a Representative.

Have you found yourself dating a Visitor, meaning a person who shows up like a guest. The Visitor will claim to be committed to the relationship, but not as a full-time partner. The Visitor will make an appearance only when the time is convenient for them. Dating a Visitor is like being at a pit stop; they will come through to have their needs attend to, and before you can blink they are gone. The Visitor can appear and disappear in and out of a relationship like a magician. Being in a relationship or dating situation with a Visitor is emotionally and mentally draining so, the next time you observe yourself dating a Visitor, put out a No Vacancy sign.

At the first encounter there is no meter to measure whether the person we seek to be in a relationship is who they say they are, and have good intention. I recommend that when dating take your time, don’t rush and when something doesn’t feel right go with that feeling. Don’t wait around for another person to complete who you are. You are enough as you are. Love yourself like you want the others person to love you. When you don’t resolve baggage from past relationships and behave in a desperate manner that’s when you fall victim to these people who are Freeloaders, Representatives, and Visitors. Pay attention to what they say or don’t say. There are warning signs, but people become so involved in the emotional rollercoaster while dating that they loses sight of the warning signs. For the people who have lost faith in finding love, be the love that you want to receive.

What say You? Check out my You Tube channel: Conversations with J. R. Floyd for more realtionship topics. 2DgfpAQ6

The lost Value of Relationships

Dear Readers,

It no longer takes a village because we live in a world that has lost the  meaning, value and  the foundation of relationships. There is so much separation of people due to race, class and economic status. We tend to view relationships as obligations or as inconvenience if there is nothing to gain. We place requirements and conditions in order to engage in relationships……I say more in this vlog. Thank you for watch.

 

 

Love & Marriage

Dear readers,

Remember the TV series Married with Children , 1987-1997, and that theme song, ” Love and Marriage, love and Marriage they go together like a horse and carriage.” Speaking of the subject love and Marriage, Tina Turner had a hit song, What’s love got to do with it? For the majority of people who are married they will say they said ” I do” because of love. There is a movies produced by Tyler Perry that ask the question, Why Did I Get Married?

I read  an article by Maggie Gallagher: What’s Marriage Got to Do With Love?

She writes,

Why do lovers marry? For centuries the answer might have been self-evident, but in today’s world where cohabitation is more bourgeois then bohemian, it’s an open question. I posed it not long ago to a group of young, college-educated women. Krista, a 23 year old writer, tried to explain why its so important to her that she and her live -in boyfriend get married. ” I just love the words ” husband and ‘wife”, she says, almost ruefully. ” I know the words are archaic, but I just love the whole idea.”

Krista, like the other young women in the room, lives with the omnipresent reality of divorce. they know a marriage license is no guarantee of permanence. Sex and affection they already have from their boyfriends. Yet, women like Krista long, almost irrationally, for the nuptial bond. the words ” I love you have been drained, through overuse, of all special meanings. and the act of love no longer signifies union. All that is left is this fail, eroding word, ” marriage,” packed with centuries of loving, living growing old together, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.

American are marrying people-like Krista, nine out of 10 adult women tie the knot at least once. And yet Americans also have the highest divorce rate in the western world. How do we reconcile the cultural contradiction.

What say you?

love-and-marriage