Sister’s Can You Relate?

I want to start dating again, but as a woman I don’t know if this is politically correct. Why, because women are told that they are supposed to wait for their husband, and that women are not to chase men rather they are to pursue us. However, the ultimate question is what does dating mean? In my case I went from a naive 17 year old virgin to a clueless teenager mother, and all of my experiences with dating were horrible. I thought that dating meant getting married and riding off into the sunset happily ever after. Looking back I now understand that I didn’t have to respond to every man that whistled at me, and that some men inttention weren’t honorable.

Anyway, I’ve spend years going through the healing process from a abused childhood, survivor of domestic volience, and other dysfunctional intimate situationships. The darkness and chaos in my life lead me to seek help to understand why my life was out of order. It’s been a long and painful process of self reflection, therapy, diving into self help books, yoga, self care retreats, choosing to remain single, no dating and practicing celibacy.
Despite all the new knowledge I have aquired my journey has been lonely. But I had to do what was needed to understand the behavior, thinking, and addictive patterns that kept me in a cycle of depression, relationship drama, and repeating the same mistakes both professionally and personally. Year after year I purged myself of the demons of my past. I feel good about where I am in life. I have a better vision of my purpose, how and what I need to accomplish my goals, but what I lack is companionship from a partner that’s my equal.

At the age of 57, I desire to be courted respectfully and properly, with sincerity instead of lies and con games. I need pure dating without the pressure of quick meaningless intimacy. I have various interest, I love the outdoors camping life style, driving cross country, exploring new cusine, gardening, reading, cooking and entertaining family and friends. I am working towards building a tiny house for retirement, and will continue to pursue, publishing books, blogging, and entering a new stage of my career as a public speaker. I still have some self work to do, but I know that I can enter a relationship fresh with less baggage. The only hinders besides getting past the fear of dating is waiting until it is safe to go out and meet people due to the coronavirus. In the meantime, I will remain hopeful.

Thank you for stopping by dragthepen ❤️

The Dangerous of Relationship Myths

Dear Readers,

I am no relationship expert, let the truth be told, I have failed at every attempt of establishing and maintaining a lasting intimate partnership.Yes, I am willing to be vulnerable and bare my soul by taking responsibility for why I entered and participated in many dysfunctional intimate and personal relationships that only served the purpose of robbing me of my self worth.

How many times we’ve heard this saying
” experience is the best teacher,” this is not true in all areas of life. After surviving some experiences that threatened to rob me of life and hope. What I now know is that I would have benefited from some information, preparation and foundation about certain areas of life that I had the least experience. Sometimes when individuals are left out to hang so to speak, that saying, ” experience is the best teacher” can leave some people with lasting emotional and mental damage.

I created the YouTube channel, Conversations with J R Floyd, to openly discuss relationship myths that lead people into dysfunctional relationships. These myths damage self esteem, and self worth. We learn to be mistrustful, how to scheme, not to show our authentic self because we don’t know who we are. Damaged people know who they are by what’s others tell them who they are according to personal bias.

As a society we will not be able to heal and gain clarity, if we are not willing to point the finger of blame correctly where it belongs, learn to forgive others and ourself, and go through a process healing to close the wounds inflicted as a results of emotional and mental trauma. I lived in denial for years, blinded by hopeless and anger, surrounded by broken people like myself. I am happy to say that I dug deep for my healing. I honor the entire journey even the dark, lonely, hopeless days. Today, I stand on firm ground, I know who I am and have better clarity and purpose. My experiences did not kill me, some made me stronger, wiser and most important when to seek help.

Some relationship myths

  1. If he lays with you he will stay with you. This is not necessarily true.
  2. Being labeled baby mama doesn’t equal being a wife. Most women who give birth to children without being legally married expect to be treated like a wife
  3. Shacking up means he is keeping his options open. Ask yourself a question, why isn’t he honoring you with marriage?
  4. There is no honor in being someone side piece. This seems to be a dangerous trend that is honored in today’s society.
  5. Women who devote years of their lives to a man who aren’t their husband. To each his own, but don’t be angry when he marrys someone else
  6. He or she isn’t the one, so you try to change them. It’s not our duty to change anyone. Accept and allow people to be who they are or move on and find your equal.
  7. Ladies if he is dating and calling you only at night, recognize what you are, ” a booty call”
  8. It’s cheaper to keep her inside of seeking a divorce. Ladies this is how men feel about you when he has invested financially in a marriage or long term partnership.
  9. Having any man is better than no man, even if he is somebody else’s man. In other words, your a side piece
  10. People are justified when they have sexual relationships outside of their marriage.

These are just a few myths and topics on my YouTube channel, conversations with J R Floyd. Join me.

Thank you for stopping by dragthepen ❤️

Ladies are you making yourself too available?

Dear Readers,

 There are some omen who make themselves too available for men, and of course we know who benefits from this situation. I observe and personally acquainted with diverse women from various professions, earning power and education, who spend an increasing amount of hours  accommodating men. This post is in detail demonstrating a few areas where women are making mistakes  when dating or uncertain about their position in a situationship. One major problem with women who make themselves too available to men, they become a convenience instead of an equal partner in a loving, supportive long term relationship. One problem with this situation is that the women who ruin men by making themselves ready available, when these men move on it makes it difficult for other women who will not be at a mans beck and call.  

One  mistake some women make while dating is that they tend to perform wifely duties without the benefit of being a wife. For the sake of clarity a wife means a woman has walked down the aisle, taken vows before God and witnesses, and has been bonded with a man in holy matrimony. Not a wife in the sense that women are labeled a wife or in a common law situation. Women need to stop playing the role of a wife without the benefits, taking care of his laundry, cleaning his apartment, cooking, lending him money and your car, and  paying his bills. Ladies this is called playing house and being played. 

Many women are dating without a clear defined purpose or dating with the word desperation stamped across their foreheads; reeking with the scent of I’ll do anything just as long as you make me feel important, and that I am your one and only. Women who make themselves sexually available before establishing whether they are in a committed relationship. Ladies if your willingly give yourself over to a man physically, be ready to accept what’s coming, meaning expect to be asked for sexual favors often, and when you become weary of giving your body to a man who has not committed to you or sees you as his means to release his frustrations, you will  have yourself to blame. Why? Bottom line a man will take what is offered to him. 

 Here are a few ways women set themselves up for failure by answering late night texts, calls, and allow men to show up at their homes unexpectedly. Over time these bad habits become inconvenient to women, and beginning taken for granted. Women who rearrange or adjust their schedule to meet the needs of selfish men who take advantage of women with low self -esteem, because they don’t know their worth.Women became trapped in the bad habit of being a man’s savior by standing by his side even when he is wrong. Overtime women come to the realization that they are not honored or loved because of their good qualities, but because you’re the type of women men call EASY. You’ve made yourself too available and now  you don’t know how to break the spell.   

Thank you for stopping by dragthepen.

I’m just saying

Dear Readers,

I don’t understand living in a society that is complacent about women and little girls being raped, molested, forced into marriage,and child brides, encouraging women to remain in abusive relationships, being side chicks, sex workers, baby mother’s instead of honorable wives. Why are we placing more value on men, yet, we disgrace the women who risk their lives to give birth to men.

Thank  you for stopping by Dragthepen

From a Woman You Are Born

Dear Readers,

I don’t mean to start the New Year off on a sour note, but there is something that’s been on my mind and I would like to hear what you have to say about this matter. I have noticed a black-lash focused on women. There is this idea that what has gone wrong with men is because women need be better. A very popular Pastor, stated that ” women who say they don’t need a man is suffer from the spirit of lesbianism”. It is also said that women who are fortunate to be self- sufficient, and that their well being isn’t depended upon a man that these women are single because they are not allowing a man to be a man.

Black women are are the top of this accusation because it is said that they are the reason why millions of black men are incarcerated. These men have lost their place in their homes because some women have risen up and taken charge, so men no longer feel useful, in other words, “they don’t feel like a man”.

So, there are books, conferences, webinars,and seminars for the purpose of getting women to understand their submissive role, as a mother and wife, and not as an individual, and some how by going outside of their normal roles they don’t fit into society. There is a course titled, Wife in Training, in this course women are being told to wait and prepare for their husbands. Women are being told not to date because dating leads to sex, and a woman who have had multiple sex partners is referred to as used or loose. I have observed and spoken to women who are waiting in anger and frustration because they desire to be deemed ” a good women”. Some women are young and have little to no experience with men, therefore, their minds and hearts can be molded by the first man who comes along and says those magic words, ” I love You”.
Forced marriages, arranged marriages, women sold into marriages, women who are married to abusers who on the outside portrays himself to be the perfect husband and a pillar of the community. Women are suffering behind closed doors due to financial abuse, cheating husbands, absentee husbands, the kind that works, pays the bills and arrives home when he feels it needed. Women are being told to stay with their husbands because being single is not good. As I recall the Bible says in Genesis, God Said” it is not good for a man to be alone”. Have you noticed that when a women frees herself from a relationship that doesn’t allow her to grow once she lands back on her feet she glows.

There are smart, talent, educated women having to hold themselves back, so they don’t take the spot light off of their man. Look at the case of Ike and Tina Turner, and who turned out to be the winner?
Women are leaving marriages that they have been for 10, 20, 30 plus years, why, because they weren’t allowed to flourish they were stuck under the titles of wife, mother, cook, car pooler, problem solvers, and their worth and contribution never equals that of a man who goes out and slay the bacon because he is doing what a man is supposed to do.
I wonder why so much aggression toward women? Women beaten down with such disgraceful labels, and women in Hollywood are baring it all and engaging in cat fights in order to stay on top. Women are used in videos not for their talent, but like porn stars and freaks. There are plenty of women who are making the choice to be single because of their experiences and they don’t want to settle. Men are bachelors for years and they are celebrate as doing the right thing because they are avoiding ” gold diggers”.

I am going to stop here. I hope that I have gotten my point across. To the women who are fortunate to find a man who will respect and love you until death does it part, God bless you. For the women like me who have decided enough of useless relationships and choose to remain single, and be happy with life, good for you. To the men of this world I say, no women likes to be abused, conned, held back, lied to and strung along, and what goes around comes around. and when you find yourself in your old age looking for a caretaker, just remember in your youth all the chances you had to embrace love, but you wanted to be a player instead.

The choice is yours, the wait is over.

Thank you for stopping by dragthepen.

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Story-time

Dear readers, please excuse me I posted part two of this story and forgot part one. ENJOY

 

The Prince and the Empress

King Leopold Edward Nenufar of the Slopheovaia kingdom is old and in poor health. The time has come for Prince Christian Edward Nenufar to marry. He is the only heir to the throne. Prince Christian desired to have a union like the one his parents’ had. Their marriage was forged out of love, not out of a call to duty.  While growing up in the palace, he witnessed his parent’s admiration for each other. When his mother, Queen Camila Nenufar died while giving birth to a second child, a girl, who also perished, his father almost ceased to live.  After many years, the Kings royal council pleaded with him to take another wife; He refused, the King said, “I had his one true love.”  This is the story of how Prince Christian Nenufar found his one true love.

Part 1:The encounter

Prince Christian shut himself in his bedchamber. He is weary from the activities at court. Women had come from eight different kingdoms to be presented as his brides. He disliked that these women wanted to marry him for the title and to live a comfortable life at court. Prince Christian sat by the window looks over the room he has lived in since childhood. Overtime the color of the walls changed from a light powered blue to a darker royal blue to reflect the mature status of a Prince. The room contains the Mahoney writing table, a gift from his grandfather. His bed is not the traditional canopy style; instead, he sleeps in an open Juliet four-posted bed. He looks down at the dark blue and gray Persian rug, and memories of rolling around with his playmate Lanceworth flash through his mind. He lets out a heavy sigh because he would be moved to his father’s room, the kings’ chambers, after his marriage, leaving all of these memories behind and creating new ones. Opening the curtains, he looks out over the garden.

He saw her in the palace garden among the rows of roses.  Her long black curly hair enchanted him as it shined in the sunlight like the stars at night.

He watched her moving around bending, placing her nose against the bud of each rose; her hair fell guarding her face. She walked like a goddess, and wore a pale blue gown with a long white train that floated like a cloud behind her.

He scrutinized her slender and delicate hands as she touched each rose with the gentleness of a mother’s love.

His thoughts are interrupted by the call of his manservant Lanceworth.  Prince Christian pointed towards the women in the garden, and asked, “Who is she?”

Lanceworth sighed, “I am sorry my prince, I know not this maiden.”

The moment he turned to leave the window, she raised her face towards the sun, inhaling the fragrance of the garden. Her hair fell in a wave of curls, revealing her pearly smooth skin.

She opened her eyes. He glanced into her teal colored eyes and was lost in the moment.

Deep in thought, he did not notice when she vanished from the garden.  Panic seized him; he turned to Lanceworth and shouted, “Where did she go?”

“Who?” he replied with caution.

“The woman who was in the garden,” Prince Christian demanded.

“My prince, I barely saw her.” Lanceworth responded with alarm in his voice.

“Lanceworth, I need you to summons all of the women who were at court today, she is the one I have found my bride.”

Lanceworth replied, “All of them are packing to leave.”

Prince Christian answered with anger in this voice, “I do not care what they have done and where they go, as long as I find her, my heart is telling me she is the one.”

‘As you wish my prince,” Lanceworth replied as he rushed from the room. “Alert the King,” The prince called out.

In the meantime, Prince Christian called for his royal tailors to change into his formal wear. He wanted to present himself in the proper manner to his future bride. Surely, his father was going to be pleased. He wished his mother lived to see this day. It felt like an eternity before he was  announced into court. Prince Christian stood before his father’s throne with the women crowded around him.

King Leopold spoke, “my son, I am told that you have chosen a bride.”

The prince replied with pride in his voice, “This is true father.” The king raised his hand towards the women and instructed his son to bring forth his bride.

Prince Christian walked slowly up and down, searching for the angelic beauty that he saw in the garden. In the midst of the smiling faces, heavy makeup, and tons of jewelry, he did not find her. He turned to his father and said, “She is not here.”

The King told him to look again.

He did but she was not there. Prince Christian called out to Lancewroth. “Is this all the women?”

“Yes, my prince,” answered Lancworth.

Filled with disappointment he turned towards the king, said, “I am sorry father, I must have been mistaken she is not among these women,”

The king asked him, “Can you describe her?”

“Yes,” said the prince, “she was in the west side of the garden where mother planted the rose bush. She has long black curly hair and bluish green eyes as big as crystal balls. Her skin glowed like satin; in the blue dressing gown,” she was wearing.

The king asked, “Was she in the garden alone?”

The prince answered “yes father I saw no one with her.”

The room is silent.

King Leopold spoke, “might I suggest that the ladies go back to their rooms, and the owner of the gown my son described, come forth.”

While the king and the prince waited in the room, one of the woman came forth and requested to speak with the king.  She claimed to know the identity of the woman the prince was seeking. When she entered the Great Hall, and she told the prince that the women he is looking for is her daughters’ lady -in –waiting. She slipped into the garden today without permission.

Prince Christian asked her to bring the girl to him. She did as the prince requested.  As soon as he laid eyes on her, his heart leaped.

The king spoke, “come forth my child, do not be afraid, He asked her, “were you in the garden today, alone, by the rose bush?”

In a small soft voice, she answered, “Yes your Majesty, pardon me for the trouble I have caused, the roses are beautiful and I desired a closer look.”

The king laughed, “No harm my child, those roses were planted by wife, I am happy they brought you pleasure.” She bowed and left the room.

“Father she is the one,” the Prince said,

“My son, she is a lady- in- waiting.” The king replied. “No one in our blood line has ever married outside of the royal court.”

The prince pleaded with the King, “Father as soon as I saw her, I knew she was the one.”

“I am sorry but I cannot give my blessing to such a union.” Replied the king.

Prince Christian spoke in a sincere voice.  “Father, I have never asked much of you. Please, allow me to be with a woman that I can love and seek comfort with as you did with my mother.”

The king remained silent, as his son’s words penetrated his heart. The king wanted his son to be blissful in his married life. Nevertheless, he cannot overlook the fact that the former queen was of royal blood.

King Leopold looked into his sons pleading eyes; suggesting they call upon her mistress to inquire of the young woman’s heritage. This request from the King excited the prince and gave him hope. He sent for Lanceworth to bring the girl and her mistress forward.

“Forgive me my prince,” said Lanceworth,” all of the guest have set sail for home.”  The prince did not stay to hear another word. He rushed from the room, towards the sea running past the palace guards; they called out after him “my lord is there trouble?”

Prince Christian continued towards the sea where the fleet of ships were departing. He hoped he was not too late.

When he reached the shore, he dived into the sea swimming to catch the last ship. The guards rushed to pull him back on shore, but the prince in desperation, struggled against them yelling,

“Let me be! I must stop them.” As hard as he fought, they over powered him and brought him back on dry land.

Prince Christian sat on the shore watching the ships disappear one by one into the horizon. The guards pleaded with him to go back to the palace. The prince refused to move.  Only when Lanceworth kneeled at his side and whispered in his ear,

“My prince I have information concerning the royal house the maiden serves,” these words gave the prince the strength to stand and he allowed the guards to guide him back to the palace.

After the prince refreshed himself, the king called him to his chambers. He walked towards his father’s quarters with a heavy heart, feeling defeated.

When he entered the room, king Leopold sat up in bed, he looked fragile. Prince Christian felt a pain in his heart. He approached the bed and sat next to his father. He wondered how many more moments like these would they share before death took him.

The king broke the silence.

“Son, all future kings faced this same moment when they are presented with a bride not of their choosing.” The Prince looked at his father with an expression of confusion.

The king rose from the bed and began to pace the floor; the king asked his son, “Have I ever told you the story of how I meet your mother?”

“No father. You have not,” replied the prince.

“Your grandfather went in search of my bride, and when he found her, he came back with a portrait. Her name was Lady Pricilla Heathcott; you know her father, King Fredrick Heathcott’s of the Penfirden realm. She was young and beautiful; and I had to do what was required of me. At the time of my proposed marriage, our kingdom was threatened with war; my marriage to Lady Heathcott promised to form an alliance between the two smaller kingdoms in order to build a strong army.

While preparations were being made to receive my bride, we received the news that Lady Heathcott ships was caught in a violent storm, only two out of the four ships made it to safety, my bride was not so lucky. The lost was great. Her mother, brothers along with other family members, perished. Her father and eldest sister were unable to make the voyage.  Because of this tragedy, a period of mourning was declared. There was an agreement of peace out of respect for King Heathcott.

Months later, your grandfather and I made the trip to visit King Heathcott to pay our respects and that is when I met your mother, Lady Camila Heathcott. She was the eldest sister of my intended. She could not make the trip, due to illness.  I was comforting her over the loss of her sister we fall in love. We dared not allow anyone to know because we did not want to offend her father.

By some means your grandfather found out, and fearing the word would get back to her father, he forbade me to see her. I begged him to approach King Heathcott to ask for lady

Camila’s hand in marriage. Your grandfather did not think it was a good idea, but I would not give up, hence, your clever grandfather derived a plan. He suggested to her father that I marry Lady Heathcott in case their enemies changed their mind and declared war on them again.

At first, King Heathcott feared losing another daughter to the sea; she was his only remaining child. Your grandfather continued to press the issue about the protection of our two countries, and it worked. We were married in secret, not to alert the other kingdoms. We left immediately following the ceremony.  The day we departed for home, I promised her father that I would protect his daughter with my life. Your mother brought me many years of happiness, even in death “I still feel her presence.”  Finishing his story, the king sighed.

Prince Christian asked his father, “What am I to do?”

The king said, “Go my son and find your bride, as your mother’s father willingly departed with his only child, so to must I.”

Stay Tune for part 2…………

The Waiting Game

TWG Cover

Dear Readers:

Some people say waiting is a part of life. I say it depends on what you’re waiting for and why. With that said, I apologize to my patient supporters who’ve encouraged me through the entire penning of my book. Due to technical difficulties beyond my control, I was unable to meet my publishing deadline on August 24, 2015.  In the meantime, while I am fixing things behind the scenes, please enjoy this sneak preview of my memoir.

“The Waiting Game” details the relationship myths that women hear about through the generations. Women are taught that men are not attracted to strong women, and that a woman’s primary role in society is to get the man and keep him interested. Women have to follow the rules of the game to be successful. Rule one, use prime bait. Rule two, catch the man. Rule three, keep the man no matter what characteristics he possesses.  Any rules after that, the men play the rest of the game. Therefore, if this task is not completed—we fail as women.

Read this and:

Let Your Reminiscence Unfold

Setting the Stage

It is said that if you stop looking for love it will come to you, and if you love someone set them free; if the relationship is meant to be they will come back.  Well, in my case, this saying is a myth. I am a 51-year-old mother of one and grandmother of three. I had one short horrible marriage and several hit and run relationships.

I thought that I once had the love of my life, but he ran for the hills when I mentioned marriage. I found out that most of my lovers moved on to get married and live happy lives. What is so painful about reliving these memories is that none of these men thought that I was wife material or good enough to be the mother of his children.

There is something very evil and disturbing about men who will have sex with you, lie to you, play you like a fiddle, while closing the door in your face.

I had a few of them come back, but I was not smart enough to understand that I was just a layover before they moved on again. What is it about me that I either scare men away, attack losers or men who simply don’t get me?

Most of them came with too many requirements and baggage. Baggage in the form of ex-wives who had not moved on, or ex- girlfriends who had not become the ex. In each relationship, I was expected to change and make adjustments, compromise, give up, give in until I gave out. I was not sexy enough, I did not dress sluttie enough to suit their taste. I was too conservative, too aggressive, and too smart. I did not give enough of myself in bed; in other words, I was not freaky enough.

I played different roles in these relationships. For the men who refused to grow up and cut the apron strings, I had to mother them. Oh and the children; no, not my son, their children. I was the free babysitter so they could go out and hang with the boys.

My biggest role–playing wife without the ring or marriage license. When I think about all the time I wasted cooking, cleaning, washing and organizing their sad lives all in the name of L.O.V.E, I realized that Tina Turner was right: love had nothing to do with what I was going through. It was all for the sole purpose of their self-gratification. Moreover, in the end I was left emotionally confused, physically exhausted, mentally disturbed, and financially broken- exactly what they wanted.

More myths: you are still young, it is not too late, he is out there for you, and you just have not met him yet. Why do people tell you  this when deep down inside what  they really want to say is, “ Girl,  hang up your dating boots, your prince isn’t coming, settle for that frog because at this stage of the game you have to take what you can get; or settle for what’s behind door number three”.

Drum roll please…. and behind door number three we present Miss Lonely.  Yes, most women fear being alone because we have been told being alone is BAD.

Yes, the defect is always with us. It goes something like this: I am alone because I am a nag, hard to get along with, too needy, too fat, too thin, too broke and too independent.

I am selfish, bossy, noisy, fussy, and refuse to have sex 10 times a day. I am too trusting or not trusting enough. Oh, here is the climax: it is my fault that I have been replaced with a better woman. But no, I am not another angry woman as I have been labeled. I am a woman who has arrived at the end of these experiences finally understanding  who I am, where I am going, and knowing how I am going to get there, and what I will and will not put up with and why.  My story is about ignoring the warning signs, such as, when it is time to get out of an abusive relationship. A reminder: abuse does not have to be physical to leave scars. I had to learn how to put the brakes on, make a U-turn, and haul ass in the opposite direction when the drama got too deep.

This is about not lowering standards by accepting the behavior of a serial cheater. By doing so, we women put our health in danger by continuing to have sexual intercourse with him, all because women are told this is all a part of what men do. Well, A.I.D.S kills and herpes is for life, and do you really want to stay with a man who has been labeled community property?

This is about all the bad relationship myths that are damaging to women’s self-esteem and self- respect and undermine us a woman.  This is about living in a society where the double standard motto that “Boys will be Boys” is an accepted norm, while women are expected to put out and shut up.

To the men who have the great fortune and guts to read this book, it is about you understanding that men can be broken, needy, and have parts of them that need to be fixed too. Stop measuring your worth by your penis and start thinking with your brain about the quality of emotional stability, respect, caring, and love that you can give to your partner.

A final note: Men, stop being selfish; a relationship is not all about you.  Women, stop talking to your girlfriends, your mother, his mother, and talk to him, God, or a therapist.

When entering into a relationship, both men and women need to think about what they are doing and why. Nobody likes a player and games are for social activities, not for a relationship.

 

amazon.com/author/rahshemahfloyd

Thoughts from the Mad Dater

blog 7-01

Its Sunday, a beautiful warm spring day in New York City.  There are many events taking place throughout the five boroughs. I want to go out and explore, instead of staying home alone doing the same old things. While writing this  I am sitting in my back yard, sipping coffee, and reminiscing about the things I miss about having Him in my life. Things like planning date night or a weekend getaway. The excitement of time spend with Him deepening  the bond between us. I miss having Him make the coffee, and cooking weekend breakfast together. Doing the Sunday Times crossword puzzle with Him, instead of with the computer or dictionary.

Today is a good day for strolling through the park or a street fair holding hands with Him. I miss eating brunch and laughing at His corny jokes.. I don’t get flowers anymore, of course I buy them for myself; but,  I miss getting flowers from Him just because…. I’ve spent many weekends, Valentines days, holidays, weddings and other family gathers, watching couples smiling, laughing, sharing warmth and love; and I wonder, when will I meet the one that is just right for me? To hug Him at the end of  the day, to have His smile greet  me at the start of the day. Him, my best friend, confidant, my road dog, partner in crime, my equal, my lover, and husband. Him.

Dear Readers, if you have that someone special in your life, never take them for granted, love and always forgive the little things, hold hands, share hugs when ever possible, remember why you were attracted to them, and make every moment count because LONELINESS IS A KILLER.

WHAT SAY YOU?

Advice from the Mad Dater

Greetings from the mad Dater,

I heard this advice on the radio this morning: Warning men and women not to marry this type.

  1. The Broke man: If he is broke while you’re dating him, he will continue to be a financial slacker.
  2. Mama’s Boy: Competing with his mother a game no women wants to play.
  3. The Manipulator: Enough said
  4. The Ghoster: A man who fades in and out of a woman’s life. This behavior is confusing and frustrating. Hey, no fair this list isn’t complete, what about the men who are, liars, cheats, jerks, losers, cheap, a bad lay, abusive, commitment phobia…..Feel free to finish the list.            What say you?