It was August 1, six years ago when I moved into my first one bedroom apartment after living in a studio for 14 years. I had a few boxes, old furniture, 100 books, high hopes and big dreams. I was happy. Today is a very sad day. I feel like I am burying an old friend, I’m being forced out. Not because I am a bad tenant I live in a private house the landlord abruptly announced, ” The house is being rented, I’m moving my family out-of-state you have to go.” It took me a month to get over the shock. Three months later, my boxes are packed, I am leaving with new furniture, fifty books, and more shoes and clothes than I had six years ago.
I live In New York City finding an affordable apartment is not easy and that’s saying it nicely. I have arranged to put my tbelongings in storage. while living with my long time best girl friendand her 22 year old son.
During the six years in my beautiful one bedroom complete with back yard, I’ve met and dated some horrible men, and made poor financial decisions. I’ve lost some weight, gained the weight, lost the weight and gain the weight back. Studied for one years at Bible school and received my Ministry Licences. Started my first Blog, wrote and published my first Novel, ” The Waiting Game” on amazon, and entered two short shorties in a contest. December 2016 completed a Novela ” A Different Flavor of Love” so to be out on amazon. I’m currently revising a Novel I wrote with a college friend to be published next year. I have a second job$$$$$$$$$$$$$ my income is higher than is was six years ago. I auditioned for the New York City down chorus, nailed it, this my third season with them. Its amazing I am leaving during the same season I moved in six years ago. And the real big change I cut my locks after having them for 30 years.
I am sad, angry and feel betrayed. I blame myself. I wasn’t paying attention. I wasn’t focused. I was too busy try to be a part of a family that wasn’t mine. I feel ashamed, I’m educated, intelligent, passionate about living life and trying new things. Oh, and I’m an amazing teacher. At the age of 53, I have to put my belongings in storage and live in someone else space.
Where do I go from here? Forward, step by step, day by day. taking on one task at a time. Bury myself in work and my writings. UNTIL I FIND MY OWN SPACE.