At the heart of the Matter

Dear Readers,

I want to love the world through the heart of a child. To experience unconditional warmth, acceptance, to embrace life with pure openness. To love with the heart of a child is to be brave, adventurous, and unassuming. To love with the heart of a child means to be fearless, playful, selfless, and bold. To love with the heart of a child means to forgive, hold no grudges, to be curious, and ask why? When children love they embrace you with hugs that melt your heart and chase away the boogeyman. Children love with deep loyalty, and their love is not conning or wonders what they will gain or lose by loving. 

Unlike the heart of adults that have lost its warmth, locking out hope and possibilities. The heart of adults is weak, selfish, cold, and holds grudges. It’s been traumatized by disappointment, neglect, abuse, broken promises, lost love, anger, and resentment. Adults love with a heart that questions loyalty, and loves with the mindset that questions, ” what’s in it for me”? Unlike adults when children love there is no plan B, or leaving options open. 

The heart is an organ that is the center of life,  yet we are careless and neglectful in the way we take care of our hearts. The majority of humanity is guilty and careless about expressing,  practicing and showing authentic love. We take love for granted like we do our hearts until there is a breakdown then and only then we perceive how important authentic love is, and how vital it is for our survival. Nothing grows ( Matures) without love, every creature and human needs to be nurtured. But, sometimes we wait until the very thing or person that we claim to love departs from our lives to understand that love is much more than a momentary feeling, and that love is healing just as much as it is destructive. 

Are we a society that has given up on understanding the sacred power of love? I loved once it was sweet, joyful, trusting, and as blissful as the rising sun after a spring rain. I shall love again because I believe in a child like love.

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Healing

Dear readers,

I should have protected her, but I didn’t know she was sacred. When I was a young girl no one told she was the essence of my spirit and the center of my being. No one told me that if I gave her away too soon she would be abused, missed used, hated, battered, passed around, and treated as if she doesn’t have a soul. No one told me that she would cry, hide and begged to be cherished, loved, and protected. No one told me that she would be branded whore, slut, loose, easy, and old maid. I didn’t listen to her when she whispered” lets not do this again.” I pushed her concerns aside for the benefit of pleasure, but the pleasure wasn’t for us. I didn’t hear her when she begged me to stop treating her like stocks on the Wall Street trading floor sold to the highest bider. After all these years of being together I final understood and the moment that I did the emptiness and pain shook me to my core. The years of allowing others to pour into me their brokneness, suffering, pain, bitterness, resentment, and heartbreak, their spirits never left me even when I thought that I started a new. Why? Because no one told me that my womanhood, my maiden head, my innocene, the purest part of me was scared. No one told me to guard her because giving her away to the woves of this world might result in irreversible damage. No one told me that she would rebel, and that I needed to follow her into the battle to wait for the one. The one who would wait for her to mature. To understand that she needed to be loved and that she is a part if a whole. I regret that I abandon her. I was anger at her for not being better for not capturing and keeping those who I considered a soulmate. She understood they weren’t worthy.

Today, after all of the destruction of my past I realized I never forgave myself for not protecting the innocent young girl who give in too soon. Can you ever forgive me?

I write this too all the women who gave in to soon. HEAL.

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What Trendy in Relationships

Dear Readers,

I am speaking to you today about the state of relationships. I have observed a trend in relationships where one partner feels that it is his or her right to manipulate, control and dictate the way the relationship will be conducted. Whatever happened to the P in partnership. Relationships are now becoming ownership’s. I see broken people engaging in relationship after relationship in order to have a place to dump their anger and  resentment due to negative experiences in other relationships. To the people who have held on and worked through and establish a foundation for a long-term happy union, Hooray! For the people who are walking around like zombies numb to the pain that they are causing their partner due to unresolved personal issues I say seek help. The world is filled with too many broken relationships. Lets start a conversation towards healing.

I invite you to subscribe to my You Tube channel, Conversations with J. R. Floyd. And Join me live on Facebook, Thursdays, @ 8pm for more Conversations. photos taken by aahman_-2 - copyThank you for watching.