The Sparkle of the Season

Dear Readers, lets take a walk down memory lane.

During this season of giving, receiving, cooking, shopping and decking the halls, different generations will gather under the warmth, smells and sparkle of the holiday season. People are enthralled with the delight and charm of this magical time of the year. Homes are buzzing with family and friends arriving from near and far, and at grandma’s house there will be stories of old and new to share. All eyes will be on the news babies, and the amazement of the little tots who have sprouted up an inch or two. During this time of year the emotional bond deepens as new memories are made, and some recipes are passed from one generation  to the next.

I often think back to my childhood Christmases the anticipation of my father and brothers arriving with a fresh pine smelling tree. The arrival of my grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins and neighbors  to help trim the tree, while we ate delicious home baked treats, and indulged in my father home made fruit punch made with real fruit, laughing and singing Christmas  carols. In those days the excitement wasn’t  about gifts the importance of the season was about the unity of family and connecting with neighbors.  I remember my father piling us in that old blue station wagon, and riding through different neighborhoods admiring the elaborate decorations. When we returned home my mother would be waiting with hot chocolate and a fresh biscuits.

Christmas day was one of those rare occasions when everyone keep on their pajamas, while unwrapping  gifts and eating breakfast. There  was no rush to leave the house. Christmas  day was a day for family to stay home. My dad would read the story of the three Magi followed by watching the parade. Since we lived in a four story brownstone we hosted the family dinner on Christmas  day. The house was filled with fun, food, laugher, and people coming and going. The celebration  would last deep into the night with the adults lingering in the dining room, while the children  settle in the living room either asleep or watching Christmas movies.

I truly  miss the joy and simplicity of those days. I think the holidays have been destroyed by commercialism, greed and the deal of black Friday. People give because they expect to receive. Even after the 12 days of Christmas have faded people only talk about the material gain, and not about the family gatherings. I have decided that I will take back my way of celebrating the holidays by honoring my father’s tradition of having a live tree and my mother’s touch by backing cleaning and decorating the house.  I will prepare feast on a small scale, stock up on wine, brandy and egg nog. My door is open to all who truly desire to celebrate both Christmas,   Hanukkah, and Kwanzaa by just sitting back enjoying a meal, good spirits and the time to slow down and connect.

What is your fondest Christmas  memory?
Happy Holidays from dragthepen🥂

Family Matters?

Dear readers,

Please bear with me, this post is a little longer than I am accustomed to writing, I believe that what I have to share will be beneficial to someone.

A few weeks ago I was invited to Sunday dinner at the home of the Evans family (family of five, three girls plus mom and dad) Ms. E is an old college mate, she didn’t finished college because she got married and started a family. I was excited! Being single has its pros and cons, one downside is eating alone. Anyway, I arrived at 2 pm with a bottle of wine, flowers for Ms. E and crumbs cupcakes for the girls to have after dinner.

Mr. E. greeted me at the door and quickly disappeared upstairs to the bedroom. After hugging the girls and chatting for a few minutes, me and Ms. E settled in the kitchen, opened the wine and proceeded to catch up on life.  An hour into my visit my excitement went from 10 to 0. I was looking forward to a family day, you know the old fashion way families use to spend time. Playing games, laughing and talking over dinner and then maybe a movie with popcorn to close out the evening.

What I got was the girls in the living room engaged in their electronic devices, there wasn’t any talking, no interaction between them, they sat staring as in a trance at their I pads, and their ears were plugged up.  I sensed Ms. E’s embarrassment about the situation, so she justified their behavior by saying that Mr. E has been working long hours during the week, and on the weekends he likes the house to be quiet.

Ms. E and I stayed in the kitchen drinking wine, chopping, cooking and talking. After a while reality set in Ms. E wanted company. She craved someone to talk to, she was feeling lonely and disconnected. There came a point during the period before we ate dinner that the youngest child become restless, she was told by Ms. E to go and play quietly in her room. She was sent to play in her room alone, instead of remaining in the kitchen with us.

The other children were woken from their trance by Ms. E. to set up the table. At 4 pm, Ms. E called Mr. E to the dinner table, by this time the youngest child had fallen asleep, the father said leave her to sleep, Ms. E did not protest.  It took a moment to get out plates filled and for a conversation to start, but it wasn’t a meaningful conversation. The girls answered my questions with short response, and Mr. E mostly talked about how much over time he was doing, and Ms. E kept asking everyone did they want more to eat. During dinner the youngest child woke to join us.

After we ate, Mr. E excused himself to go and full the vehicles up with gas for the coming week. I helped Ms. E cleaned the kitchen, put the food away and to set up coffee and the cupcakes for the girls, they ate a few bites and asked to go to their rooms to watch a show on the Disney Channel. I stayed with Ms. E for another hour and said my good byes at 7pm, there was no Mr. E in sight.

I went home and got out my old family albums and spent time remembering the good old days. I called Ms. E letting her know I got home safe and thanking her for the dinner. I extended an invite for her and the family to have dinner at my house the next Sunday. What I didn’t tell her was that I was going to invite some of my family members so she can experience what a good old fashion Sunday Family Dinner is supposed to be.

Family bonding is important.

What say you?