The Joys of Freewill

Dear Readers, 

While I was out on my 1 hour pandemic walk, something I’ve been doing since being ordered to shelter in place. Although my gym is open I’m afraid to go back, so I created a daily workout routine indoor and my outdoor activities consist of walking the outside perimeter of the football field near my house.

 I was listening to Miles Davis and my mind wondered about the life of prisoners and the limitations they struggle with. I know that there is no comparison to the limitations placed on our lives due to the coronavirus, and the striction placed on a prisoner due to crimes committed against society.  

I began to think about what it feels like to lose privileges and freedom of choice, to be able to  make decisions based on what we feel we need or want. For now our so called normal has been turned upside down, we have to put great thought into who we are around, where we can and can’t go, but we still enjoy some freedoms, as we sit, hope, and wait for the day when we can exist in something that resembles what we use to know as normal. 

 In the case of some prisoners they have no hope of life returning to normal. Once branded a criminal, this label sticks. When a person who has been incarcerated serves their time and is released back into society they have conditions placed on their lives that seem impossible to overcome.They have to check in with a probation officer, can’t live in public housing, is denied  the opportunity to apply for government assistance, difficulty finding employment, and they no longer have the right to vote. All the rights and privileges endowed to all individuals. To add insult to injury their criminal record follows them for the rest of their life.  

I said that to say this, all the privileges that we might moan and groan about missing during this pandemic like, dining out, broadway shows, sporting events, going to the gym, and meeting friends for cocktails or coffee. Although at this time we have to be careful, we can still exercise  making choices by free will. Oftentimes when an event like a pandemic occurs we are often reminded that what we think we are missing or can’t live without, we should be thankful for what we do have and for the freedom of choice.

For These Reasons

Dear readers,

I am a firm believer that people aren’t meant to be alone. When I say alone I am referring to being without a capable partner. Being alone in today’s society is a choice that more and more people are making because they not open to the unnecessary relationship drama. Let me clarify this statement a good long-term relationship takes effort, time, work and a lot of energy. Both partners must be willing to commit to working on their own personal growth, while supporting the foundation of their partnership. There will be certain aspects of a relationship that needs more work than other areas. If SACRIFICES have to be made it should be done for the improvement of the partnership, and no one person should feel that his or her needs are not being given equal attention this is called BALANCE. When a couple decides to cohabitate, there should not be a division of responsible based on GENDER. Yes, there will be things that your partner is better at doing such as laundry, and that’s ok.  In the house that I was raised there was no labeling of women chores versus what a man should and should not do in the home. My father’s theory was that men should contribute in the home as way means to show support, respect and love for his wife. In this way they model for their children how a family unit work together as a team.

Communication between a man and women should be done on an open and fair level. I do not take kindly to my partner raising his voice at me and taking to me in a tone of a parent or   using profanity Remember harsh words that are said in the heat of anger are the words that hurt the most and they cause irreversible damage. A person can forgive but they will never forget. Relationships have changes because of misconceptions, unreasonable expectations, and learnt dysfunctional behavior. We have society of broken of men and women who have been abused played games, experienced deception by people they trust, lack love, compassion, and there is a shortage of individuals who desire to commit to an old-fashioned monogamous relationship. These factors and more have contribute to people throwing up their hands in submission and surrendering to being without a partner. I have seen an increase in people who prefer to adapt a pet then to become entangled with the unnecessary drama a relationship. And this is where I find myself, I am not weary of being without a partner, and yes, I have a dog named jo-jo, who greets me every morning and evening with excitement and love in his heart. Don’t get me wrong our partnership as owner and pet is not a perfect one. We have out days when he barks a little louder than usual and I cross my arms and stand my ground. There are days when he wants me to get up early because he wants to go out. There are days that he begs for some table scraps and I give in. But we have an unspoken bond. I take care of him, respect his space, give him my undivided attention when he is barking louder than usual, and in return I have a best friend for as long as life will allow us. Now who would want this?

What Say you?

Don’t forget to watch my Youtuve channel: Conversations with J. F. Floyd

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Self Reflection